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The Crack Magazine

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There ain’t nothing like a dame…

It’s the time of the year when the region’s theatres provide us with crossdressing fun for all the family. Yep, it’s panto time and here are some of our faves.

Newcastle’s Theatre Royal are really pushing the panto boat out this year as 2025 marks the 20th anniversary of Danny and Clive’s record-breaking run at the venue. And for such an occasion they’re giving us one of the true classics in the shape of Aladdin. And Danny and Clive will be joined by all the old favourites including Joe McElderry who will be belting out some classic pop hits – and no doubt taking a fair bit of ribbing (25 November-18 January). There’ll be plenty of star power at the Sunderland Empire too when they welcome Call The Midwife star Laura Main to the stage to sprinkle some festive magic over this year’s panto spectacular, Sleeping Beauty. She’s set to be joined by Channel 5 Milkshake! presenter David Ribi and West End Star Jordan Lee Davis (12 December-4 January). The Middlesbrough Theatre are giving a distinct circus twist to this year’s production of Goldilocks and the Three Bears, and in the role of the Wicked Ringmaster is Strictly Come Dancing fave Ian Waite. This spectacular production will feature stunning sets, dazzling costumes and lots of audience participation to keep the whole family entertained (5-31 December). Also on Teesside, and also giving us Goldilocks and the Three Bears, is the Darlington Hippodrome (pictured). And – what do you know? – their Evil Ringmaster is being played by Strictly Come Dancing’s Brendan Cole. This riotous comedy will feature extraordinary special effects, hair-raising stunts and international circus acts. The gist? Goldilocks’ circus is under threat but she’s battling to rescue their big top from ruin. All seems lost, but can three bears save the day? (Spoiler: yes.) (5-31 December). Durham always puts on a good festive show and this year Gala Durham has the evergreen Jack and the Beanstalk for your delectation. With fabulously over-the-top costumes, hilarious gags, dazzling dance routines and sing-a-longs galore, why don’t you join Jack and his mates and be transported to a land of magical creatures and one very hungry giant (20 November-31 December). Newcastle’s Northern Stage are renowned for their classy Christmas shows and that won’t be any different this year when they present Beauty and the Beast. Their adaptation will put a magical and hilarious twist on this much-loved tale for new audiences and fans of the original alike (4 December-3 January). Also in Newcastle the Tyne Theatre & Opera House are going to the ball with Cinderella. Starring singing legend Maureen Nolan as the Fairy Godmother, Britain’s Got Talent winners Twist & Pulse, plus panto legends Charlie Richmond, Robbie Dee, Lewis Denny and Micky Cochrane, this promises to be a hilarious and utterly magical show (5 December-4 January). The Royalty Theatre in Sunderland recently celebrated their 100th birthday and they’ll be celebrating in fine style with their production of Dick Whittington. This family panto promises to be a real romp and bags of fun for all ages (note: Wednesday performances are relaxed performances) (5-21 December). At Empire Consett, the estimable Leah Bell and her company are once again set to tickle our funny bones with their take on Sleeping Beauty. The spellbinding tale sees Charlie Chuckles, court jester to the King, inviting everyone to the christening of the new princess. What could possibly go wrong… (28 November-31 December). At Bishop Auckland Town Hall they’ve got Jack and the Beanstalk, a laugh-out-loud, song-filled spectacular written by legendary local actor and comedian Dave Johns (I, Daniel Blake himself) (6 & 7 December). And in South Shields, The Customs House have also plumped for Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Join Dame Bella, queen of the big top, and her hapless but loveable sidekick Dennis as they fight to save their beloved circus (21 November-3 January).

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