< Back to results

Our Crack Little Crack

crackhair.jpg Lockdown Hair

Quick update on my lockdown hair. I’m now having to use a comb for the first time in years and also having to put some product on it called – hang on, I’ll need to look this up because it’s quite exotic – “conditioner”. Anyway. I note the government are beginning to ease the lockdown and let certain shops open. Some, of course, have been trading for a while and I’ve been wondering what the criteria was. I can understand food outlets and chemists being open. People have got to eat and get their medicine, as well as – hang on, what was it called again – “conditioner”. But why, in the name of all that is good and holy, is TJ Hughes open? It’s been welcoming customers into its stores for a couple of weeks at least. I didn’t think that toasters and heavily discounted Britney Spears perfumes were THAT essential items. What the government hasn’t revealed yet is when doggers can start dogging again. They’ve become the forgotten people of this pandemic. I did try dogging a few years ago and, I have to say, everyone found it pretty easy to keep two metres away from me. Two metres at the very least.